After silence

I was so preoccupied with my thoughts that I could only listen to them while falling asleep . . .

Beyond the survival instinct

I hurt myself today to see if I still believe
I focused on the pain the only thing that is unreal
I tried to kill the fears but I am numb I cannot feel
What have I become everything I know
about the unknown is the only thing that is real
that stays the same: It’s all in my head and I cannot repay my dues everyone I know stays in the same place inside themselves and if I could start over would I still choose to become what I am a memory that slowly fades away ~ in the mind of those that touched me or have being touched by me. I will never let you down I focused on the pain and if I could start again I would be as silent as I am right now . . . and you could have it all and I could have . . .

Smile a carefree smile, allow me to see*click*

Sometimes when I listen to the dark silence within me I smirk but feel fine when I remember that I lost my time chasing dandelion seeds in the wind and when it start raining Raindrops caressed my lips while the dandelion seeds found a place to call home Under a oak tree I found my refuge and I had nothing more to do than to breath in and smell the wet earth Could I smell the rain back then? No but I could feel it feel the rain inside me trapped in a cloud A dark cloud the dark silence within me. Life moves on and behind that dark cloud within me the Sun still shines - as always -